Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Snippet Update (I am a bad, bad blog parent.)

*The answer to 75% of the questions I'm asked in my life is "Because people are idiots."

*This election is seriously fucking with my brain.

*Yay for actually disciplining myself and getting back to writing a little bit a day. Took me long enough. Jesus.

*Every other word out of my mouth is a swear these days. It's getting pretty bad. Too bad I don't care enough to, you know, regain an actual vocabulary.

*I have to dye my hair back to normal for the visit home. Sucks babies, man. I liked the pink. :(

*Christian girls make me laugh when I'm watching them try to flirt. God, I need to get off this damn campus.

*Statler and Waldorf make my fucking day.

*This is getting boring. No wonder I left it alone for months.

Monday, November 26, 2007

I want some fuckin' Diet Coke.

Damn cafeteria, damn nasty pepsi products.

...I found a spanish Jerry Springer. Not that I speak spanish well at all, but the hand gestures say it all!

Alright, maybe it's not Jerry Springer.
It might be Dr. Phil.

Wow, the content of this post was genius. I saaay.

Friday, November 16, 2007

I'm in Panera Bread right now, among hard-working business people in suits and pencil skirts, and to all appearances, I'm just a diligent college student working on serious homework while eating a scrumptious Dutch Apple bagel with delicious Honey Walnut spread.

Unfortunately, this is not the case. What I'm *actually* doing is watching this...
Heads up, Jim Henson fans and all of us who grew up on Sesame Street. Remember Teeny Little Super Guy? YEAH, YA DO.

"Serious Homework":http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8j565lLvJU&eurl=http://lj-toys.com/?journalid=2909431&moduleid=13&auth_token=sessionless:1195156800:embedcontent:2909431%252%3Cbr%20/%20target=

It's a good thing I'm in a public place, or I'd be grinning goofily and making "Eeee!" noises while exclaiming "Omg, yes! He lived in a cup!" and clapping gleefully.

I, uh..share because I love?

Saturday, November 3, 2007


1) Walking to a few stores the other day, I walked by a dude who was strolling down the sidewalk hollering, "I'm gonna pee in your butt, hey hey! I'm gonna pee in your butt, hey hey!"

2) On the shuttle to Target today, the girls behind me were discussing several topics, none of them concerning education. At one point, the conversation dwindled...then one of the gals busted this out:
"So one of my elementary school teachers? Used to fake heart attacks." Completely matter of fact. I was already trying not to laugh when she followed it up with:
"Yeah, he'd lay down on a table and just shake around really hard. Any spare change that fell out of his pockets he'd, you know, let us keep."

Just think, if any of those students ever encountered someone having an actual heart attack...They'd laugh madly and make off with the person's spare change.

Actually, it's quite a good excuse for robbing the incapacitated. Hmm.

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Says researcher, Dr. Louis Lefebvre:
"People tend not to like crows, because they have this fiendish look to them and they're black and they like dead prey."

*looks around guiltily*
*scribbles "corvid" off list of possible tattoo ideas*
...Just kidding. I'd never take those birds off my tattoo ideas. Still, it's funny - I love the corvidae family, and they come in second only to Strigidae (typical owls). I finally have some good reccomendations for places to get the ink done. Even if it's still a while until I fully flesh out/sketch out the design I want, it feels like another step forward. Happy!

I need to get ahold of a black sharpie.
Those "Math Lab" fliers around campus are just asking for it.

One of my profs described his kids to us today. They lived overseas for a while, and the Prof was like "Yeah, our 7 y/o developed a full-blown Scottish brogue, so we'd ask him how his day at school went, he'd answer, and we'd be like, "...We have no idea what you just said." And then his daughter (5 y/o?) somehow adopted a high-top accent from London, so she'd wander around the apartment demanding "A spot of tea." Then he said his 21 month old was what the English generally call "a nutter". His exact words were "Yeah, he's just a nutcase. I honestly wonder sometimes if the the nurses at the hospital somehow gave him Scotch like, an hour after he was born. That'd explain a lot." His youngest daughter just "Lies around doing nothing and looking cute." I was laughing a lot. But quietly, because I came in late and had to sit by these really uptight girls with like, perfect hair and makeup that never crack a smile.

Alternately,the man that teaches Western Humanities in Christian Perspective could make even the nicest person want to punch a baby in the throat. And I'm far away from the "nicest person" status. I spent the entire time imagining ways in which he could meet his demise. I got pretty creative, too! *proud* I've decided that I'm going to stay silent in class until I figure out what points of views he most heartily disagrees with, then not open my mouth again unless it's arguing FOR those items. Seriously. He doesn't make me want to slack off; instead, I want to absorb everything he teaches me, and then use it against him. He's a smug asshole and I don't like him.

I am Syphilis. Don't Screw With Me, Or I'll Give You Dementia.
Which Horrible Affliction are you?
A Rum and Monkey disease.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

"[Botulinum toxin (Botox)] is one of the most poisonous naturally occurring substances in the world, and it is the most toxic protein."

"There are no documented cases of the toxin actually being used in warfare; however, it has been claimed to have been used in the Operation Anthropoid to kill top Nazi Reinhard Heydrich[15] and in "Operation Mongoose", where in 1961, the CIA saturated some cigars, of Fidel Castro's favorite brand, with botulinum toxin for a possible assassination attempt. The cigars were never used, but when tested years later were found still effective.[16] The notorious Japanese biological warfare group Unit 731 fed botulinum to prisoners during Japan's occupation of Manchuria in the 1930s.[17]"

I'm really abusing this site. I don't think I like the idea of using this as an actual journal - stupid internet with no privacy. But it's fun to put stuff that I find interesting up.
Yeah, fun for me. Not for you.
Too bad.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

The reason why the internet is the way it is.

This is it. Trust me.

Dunning-Kruger effect